What the Chuck?

This is a picture of Chuck Norris I have no idea why Chuck Norris has become a cult hero - but I recently read an article in the Washington Post that outlines the current twenty-something generations’ fascination with Chuck Norris (personally, I think he is the most pathetic excuse for an action hero since Fred Ward in Remo Williams). Image of RemoWilliams movie posterAfter finishing the article, I pushed this apotheosis of “Walker” out of my psyche and tried to cleanse myself of chic ironic positioning I don’t understand. But all to no avail, for my friend Zach just sent me the following link to the Chuck Norris Facts website. And while I can’t come to terms with Chuck’s new found celebrity (he’s come a long way from riding tandem with Christie Brinkly during an Informerical), I have to admit that this page is hysterical, and if I were not so attached to my disgust for Chuck I would probably see that this is part of the fun.

Here’s a couple of morsels:

  • Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
  • Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
  • Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

I just hope his cult status doesn’t garner him any undue respect!

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1 Response to “What the Chuck?”


  1. 1 Mikhail Jan 27th, 2006 at 10:17 pm

    To his credit (not that he really desrves all that much), ol’ Chuck was a student of Bruce Lee’s.

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Polls

What are your five favorite film adaptations of a Stephen King novel or story?

  • The Shining (1980) by Stanley Kubrick (23%, 34 Votes)
  • Shawshank Redemption (1994) by Frank Darabont (21%, 32 Votes)
  • Stand by Me (1986) by Rob Reiner (18%, 27 Votes)
  • Misery (1990) by Rob Reiner (17%, 25 Votes)
  • The Green Mile (1999) by Frank Darabont (13%, 19 Votes)
  • Carrie (1976) by Brian DePalma (11%, 17 Votes)
  • The Dead Zone (1983) by David Cronenberg (8%, 12 Votes)
  • Creepshow (1982) by George Romero (5%, 7 Votes)
  • Pet Cemetary (1989) by Mary Lambert (5%, 7 Votes)
  • The Mist (2007) by Frank Darabont (4%, 6 Votes)
  • Firestarter (1984) by Mark L. Lester (3%, 4 Votes)
  • The Running Man (1987) by Paul Michael Glaser (3%, 4 Votes)
  • Cujo (1983) by Lewis Teague (2%, 3 Votes)
  • Christine (1983) by John Carpenter (2%, 3 Votes)
  • Children of the Corn (1984) Fritz Kiersch (2%, 3 Votes)
  • Cat's Eye (1985) by Lewis Teague (1%, 2 Votes)
  • Dreamcatcher (2003) by Lawrence Kasdan (1%, 2 Votes)
  • Maximum Overdrive (1986) by Stephen King (1%, 2 Votes)
  • The Lawnmower Man (1992) by Brett Leonard (I imagine Stephen King would suggest this should not be on the list) (1%, 2 Votes)
  • Dolores Claibourne (1995) by Taylor Hackford (1%, 2 Votes)
  • The Dark Half (1993) by George Romero (1%, 2 Votes)
  • Apt Pupil (1998) by Bryan Singer (1%, 1 Votes)
  • Thinner (1996) by Tom Holland (1%, 1 Votes)
  • Needful Things (1993) by Fraser Clarke Heston (1%, 1 Votes)
  • Silver Bullet (1985) by Daniel Attias (1%, 1 Votes)
  • Sleepwalkers (1992) by Mick Garris (1%, 1 Votes)
  • The Mangler (1995) by Tobe Hooper (0%, 0 Votes)
  • Sometime's They Come Back (1991) by Tom McLoughlin (0%, 0 Votes)
  • Creepshow 2 (1987) by Michael Gornick (0%, 0 Votes)
  • Graveyard Shift (1990) by Ralph S. Singleton (0%, 0 Votes)

Total Voters: 150

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