Day 109: Planet of the Apes figures

Posted on September 8, 2009 by Reverend

planet_of_the_apes_figures

planet_of_the_apes_desc

Image credit: Wishbook’s “1976.xx.xx Sears Christmas Catalog (Canada) P246”

planet_of_the_apes_fortress

Image credit: Wishbook’s “1975.xx.xx Sears Christmas Catalog P573”

I don’t think there are too many cooler toys than the Planet of the Apes figures.  And their loose fitting, spandexy outfits were only half of the fun. The other half was the wide variety of 8″ gorillas, chimps or orangutans, not to mention astronauts. My brother was a major Planet of the Apes fan and had all the figures and the sets they ever made(including the Fortress and remote controlled horse) and I was lucky enough to share a room with him.  I played endlessly with these figures, and caught the film marathons on channel 9 in Long Island which I think was WWOR-TV—one of the best channels ever.

Here is the early commercials for the figures from Mego.

My favorite doll was General Ursus, I loved his military head dress, and just what an utter bad ass he was. I would lock humans up in the fortress and have the General mercilessly beat them for days on end. For, as he noted in Beneath the Planet of the Apes (1970), “the only good human is a dead human” (a very wild re-purposing of Orwell). Here’s the scene in case you forgot:

Posted in 1102xmaS | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Conquest of the Planet of the Apes – “Lousy Human Bastards”

Posted on September 8, 2009 by Reverend

conquest_planet_apesClick on the image or this link to view video.

The Planet of the Apes films have to be one of the single greatest film franchises ever. Out of the five films made, all but one were solid and compelling in their own way (that one being the last, Battle for the Planet of the Apes (1973)). Escape from the Planet of the Apes (1971) was a favorite amongst critics, but outside of the original,  Conquest of the Planet of the Apes (1972) is certainly next in line for me.  The whole theme of revolution and Caesar a prodigy of the future—which is actually a continuation of the plot line of Escape from the Planet of the Apes—witnessing his fellow apes abused and enslaved is nothing short of genius. Caesar ultimately incites a rebellion in which the apes over power their human oppressors marking the moment when the shift in earth’s dominant species from human to ape begins. You gotta love that, and you also have to love the depiction of humans as fascists and racists—in many ways it is a terribly violent and misanthropic film.

You will get a sense of both the violence and fascism in the scene linked to above, wherein Caesar (Roddy McDowall) actually speak in public for the first time after being outraged by the brutal treatment of a fellow ape at the hands of humans.  His “lousy human bastards” is a throwback and inversion of Heston’s “damned dirty apes” line. And, as an aside, it must be said that Ricardo Montalban was made for this role, he plays the perfect compassionate human. The evolution of this series is really brilliant, and watching Cornelius training and mobilizing the other apes is brilliant—and when they get armed and revolt, I was nothing but transfixed. One other thing I really enjoy about Conquest is the way it uses the built environment of Los Angeles to convey a very convincing and memorable futuristic set. Most of the outside scenes were shot in LA’s Century City Mall, which is featured nicely in the above clip, highlighting the ubiquitous stairways of this outside mall leading from store to store. Pretty remarkable these used an LA mall to frame the dystopic/fascist vision of the future. Conquest may possibly be the best sequel in terms of plot, action, and horrific subtext that may be the only other film in the series that comes even remotely close to the genius of the original.

Posted in scenic | Tagged , , , , , | 5 Comments

Day 110: The Six Million Dollar Man

Posted on September 7, 2009 by Reverend

The Six Million Dollar Man was a special toy for me because I actually got it during the only Xmas my family was ever away from home for that holiday. We were at my mother’s parents’ house in Florida, and I actually came down with Chicken Pox during the trip from NYC on Amtrak. For just about the entire two weeks I was quarantined in my own room with a host toys from that year’s bounty (I think it was 1976 or 77). 

The Six Million Dollar Man remains to this day one of the toys I remember most fondly because not only did he keep me company during that lonely week, but he also had a hole in his head that was an attempt to illustrate what it might be like to have a bionic eye through a wide-angle lens. Moreover, I also dug his red jumpsuit and sneakers, and I used my illness to actually make my mother get me a get up just like it. And while after donning it I couldn’t see any clearer, or lift engine blocks with a single hand, I must admit I looked pretty damn good!

Image credit: Wishbook’s “1976.xx.xx JCPenney Christmas Catalog P413”

And as an added bonus here is the 1976 commercial for the toy with the new and improved bionic grip:

And this crazy toy fair promo for the doll in 1974:

Posted in 1102xmaS | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

BlackBoard PSA: The Elephant in the Room

Posted on September 7, 2009 by Reverend

blackboardelephant

Special thanks to Andy Rush for the tagline and a special guest photoshop genius from the visiting the Serena Epstein.

Posted in fun | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Hippie Skippy

Posted on September 7, 2009 by Reverend

Because I can…

Image of Hippie Skippy Garbage Patch Kid

Image credit: Wishbook‘s “1986.01.xx Garbage Pail Kids 091b (Recto)”

Posted in fun | Tagged , | 4 Comments

110 Days to Xmas: Cause it’s never too early for nostalgia

Posted on September 7, 2009 by Reverend

Image from Sears Xmas catalog

Image credit: Wishbook‘s “1976.xx.xx Sears Christmas Catalog (Canada) P220”
As those of you beautiful people who frequent the bava may know, my favorite kind of blogging is rooted squarely in nostalgia. I love exaggerating and re-inventing the past, and I am of the mindset that if we are not all constantly trying to return to a vision of what was, we’ll never be able to re-imagine what is, or what can be. And in many ways I have been preparing this post for six or so posts, and had imagined it as a a pure anomaly, an 100 page blog post about the Sears Christmas catalogs of my youth, and more specifically trying to chronicle every toy I ever had as a child. Impossible? Perhaps, worthy of the time and effort, undoubtedly!

Now, while talking with Brad Efford over dinner tonight he talked me out of the 100 page blog post approach, so in order to get in as much as possible I am going to have to start soon. So tomorrow is the kick off of my “110 days to Xmas” series that will feature a toy from my childhood from the glossy, wonder-filled pages of the legendary Sears Xmas Catalogs, a kind of world wide web for toys before the world wide web was even imagined in its current incarnation. The list won’t be comprehensive, but it will certainly be representative. And some of you may be wondering how I could possibly get access to such treasures, well about six months ago I discovered Wishbook’s Flickr stream, and this genius of the highest order who represents everything that is great and beautiful about the internet scanned every page of just about every Sears Xmas catalog that ever existed. Here’s the Sears Xmas Catalog from 1971, my birth year, not sure what toys I got that year, but I’m sure they are in that catalog. What an unbelievable resource, and the scans and pagination are perfect, I can’t imagine a better source for doing intense cultural studies about consumption in the 50s, 60s, 70s, and 80s. But don’t worry, I’ll have much to say along these lines as the series moves forwards. So, Merry Christmas over three months early from the bava.

PS: The effort will be tagged #1102xmas, feel free to join in.

PSS: Just realized he/she uploaded the full complement of the Garbage Pail Kids stickers, how sick is that!

Posted in 1102xmaS | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

One False Move- Stabbing Scene

Posted on September 7, 2009 by Reverend

Tonight’s installment of scenic is brought to you by the CogDog, who blogged some books he had bought, in which I caught a glimpse of Walter Mosley’s name, which made me think of his novel Devil in a Blue Dress, which in turn made me think of the film adaptation of that book, which in turn made me think of director of that movie Carl Franklin, which in turn made me think of his other film One False Move, which in turn made me go to YouTube and find the above clip to write about. It’s all about the blogs, baby!

One False Move (1992) was actually one of the few movies of the so-called “indy film revolution” of the 1990s—which all too quickly became a Miramax booster campaign rather than a verifiable film movement of any worth—that actually lived up to the idea of an independent film. It was made on a shoestring budget, co-written by Billy Bob Thornton, and directed by one of the best, yet completely lost directors of the 1990s, Carl Franklin—why isn’t he directing more films? Especially after his masterpiece [[Devil in a Blue Dress (film)|Devil in a Blue Dress (1995). One False Move deals with the question of violence and race in some really powerful, problematic and disturbing ways. Making a film like Monster’s Ball (2001)—remember that terrible precursor to Crash (2004) that was all the rage for 5 seconds?—look like the cartoon that it is. And while Bill Paxton isn’t featured in the scene I included, his performance as the small town sheriff is rather amazing in this one.

But the part of this film that continually haunts me is the opening scene that may be one of the most difficult scenes I’ve ever watched. Not only does it have the low-budget aura of a snuff film a la Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer, but the stabbing scene is one of the most disturbingly intimate I have ever witnessed. Not only does the assassin Pluto (Michael Beach) hug his victim, but all the while a video tape that was taken minutes before is playing behind the scene featuring the victim and her boyfriend dancing and grooving. It’s deeply unsettling, so I caution you ahead of time.

What’s more, Tarantino seems to be alluding to this scene at the end of Inglorious Basterds, though obliquely, which is why that film was so amazing. Anyway, here’s to one of the most difficult and realistic visions of violence to come out of an otherwise rather desert-like moment of independent film in the 90s.

Posted in scenic | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Flash Gordon – “The Football Fight”

Posted on September 6, 2009 by Reverend

Flash Gordon (1980) is one of those films that I constantly come back to, between the inspired costumes, the great Max von Sydow as Ming the Merciless, and Doctor Zarkoff’s memory erasure which is visualized as a minute-long flashback that is an unbelievable montage, I can’t even begin to explain the influence this film had on a my imagination as a young boy. In fact, it was almost as wonder-filled as looking at the Sear’s Christmas Catalog in late November of 1980. When I think of this film in retrospect I can’t help but be amazed at how intentionally camp it was, and how entirely lost this was on me in as a 10 year old in 1980. I took it all in as straight. I was entirely sold on the Hawkmen; Arborea’s tree monster had me absolutely frightened and intrigued; and the whole idea of Flash as the space-marooned quarterback of the NY Jets appealed to my other fascination at the time which was the NFL.

I suspect much of the genius in this film owes itself as much to the legendary producer Dino De Laurentis who let it happen (check out that guy’s career—phenomenal), as it does any of the actors or its minor director. Making this film so tongue-and-cheek was the best and only way to approach it, and may explain why it is far more memorable than Buck Rogers in the 25th Century (1979) and the numerous Battlestar Gallactica attempts. There were so many Star Wars rip-offs at this time, but this is the only one that actually came to an expectant audience on its own terms. And the scene included above wherein Flash momentarily exhibits both his prowess and weakness was one of my favorites because it married the most ridiculous stormtroopers knock-offs ever (most of which is attributable to their outfits) with a quite simple and effective football drill. And when you add into all this the first major rock band film soundtrack by way of Queen what you get is a classic through and through.

Posted in scenic | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Broadway Danny Rose – “You’re living like a loser”

Posted on September 4, 2009 by Reverend

While I recognize Crimes and Misdemeanors may be Woody Allen’s most profound film, I have to say Broadway Danny Rose is my favorite Woody Allen of all time. It has some of his sharpest jokes and philosophical writing, he’s also at the top of his game aesthetically—the black and white is gorgeous. Not to mention Mia Farrow is outstanding as a tough.

In many ways I find Broadway Danny Rose his most human and vulnerable story—something he refuses in his later, solipsistic films and they suffer dearly for it. More than that, I think it’s his most literary film. Just as Bob Dylan will be remembered as much for his lyrical poetry as his music (is that a fair distinction?), Allen will be remembered as much for his writing as his films, and the framing of Broadway Danny Rose as a narrative related by a bunch of seasoned Jewish comedians at the Carnegie Deli is excellent example of why he should be. He captures New York in Broadway Danny Rose far better than the often touted Annie Hall and Manhattan. Broadway Danny Rose is his NYC masterpiece, and Danny Rose his greatest character.

Posted in scenic | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

I’m just a beard

Posted on September 3, 2009 by Reverend

We played with the Flip video cameras we got at UMW for the Digital Whitman class this past Tuesday, and we all had some fun both reading selections from “Song of Myself” and recording one another from all kinds of angles. What’s more is that the very digital Mara Scanlon got the class three Whitman Beards that will be worn regularly by select students over the course of the term. Gotta love the beards!

There are now 68 videos of the various class members reading their selections now posted in the Looking for Whitman YouTube account, take a look. I imagine this is all fodder for a larger video project/mashup down the line. And ’cause this is my blog, and nobody blogs like the bava, here I am reading a selection from “Song of Myself” with a lot of heart, let’s face it, the kid is good. In fact, nobody reads Whitman like the bava, NOBODY!

And, in other Whitman news, the UMW’s student newspaper The Bullet has an article about the class wherein I sound like a Twitter fanboy, which I’m usually not, but I do see it as potentially crucial for fostering a distributed community beyond the blogs and syndication, or even through them. But more on that anon.

Posted in Looking for Whitman | Tagged , , | 5 Comments